FUCK YOU 2016!
You were awful, and I'm so very glad you're finally over.
Now that I've gotten that out of my system...
Yes, 2016 was a hard year for many reasons - deaths both celebrity and personal, political strife, fear, feuding and chaos that I won't get into here. War, destruction, cruelty... that list could go on and on.
But - this is my blog, so I'll keep it on point, and stick with my own personal reflections on my writing, my goals, and my failures from the past year.
As always, I've learned quite a bit. That in itself redeems this last year as not being an absolute gold-star-worthy steaming, fetid pile of shit. I experimented with new projects, platforms (Patreon, I'm looking at you!), and tried to expand the way I was viewing my work as a whole. That last part excites me tremendously, but it's more of a "you'll have to wait and see" kind of thing. I've got things planned. I plot and laugh maniacally. Trust me, I do. Trying to explain here would just be too confusing though, and at the moment I'm trying my best to keep this shit simple. Not kidding - it took me twenty-eight days to write this fucking blog post. I had to rip it apart in the end, just so re-reading it didn't give me a migraine...
But - I meandered off topic again. Let's flip this parade of words back a bit:
I wrote A LOT last year. Three books, several shorts, as well as bits and sections of several other novels that are in the works. I completed the first drafts of BOTH the last two books in The Crow Series, which was one of my major goals for 2016. At least I can check THAT one off... most of my other resolutions for 2016 went up in noxious, nauseating flames :(
I only managed to publish one thing : Release.
Despite the large amount of creative work I accomplished in 2016, my publishing ambitions were just beyond my reach. I intend to do better this year, especially since I have three books already waiting to be finished and unleashed upon the world. Muhahaha! Y'all are in for it. Seriously.
On the personal end, I did a great deal of self / soul - searching (I added "/soul" because saying I did a lot of "self-searching" sounded a little too dirty :P)
There were a lot of new things I tried - and failed, and tried again, and probably failed at those too. I know I haven't stuck to my guns much the past few months, but it's hard to break out of old habits sometimes. Hiding, wallowing in failure, wrapping myself in other work to keep from wanting to smash my head into a wall EVERY TIME I think about all the writing I want to do and can't seem to manage... Wow, that was a long, winding sentence. I'm not fixing it though. It conveys how I feel. Depression is a gaping hole that sucks you in. It takes a while sometimes to find your way back out. I've realized recently that it's cyclical for me, and other than coming to terms with my migraines (which are connected), learning my own emotional rhythms has been eye opening. As long as you keep trying, right? Just keep going until you get it right.
One thing I can tell you for certain is that I'm very excited for the coming year. I have big plans - they may all go down in flames too, but right now I'm looking forward to a new start in my writing life:
Wrapping up The Crow Series. Starting on new projects. Trying new things. Making new memories.
It's gonna be awesome.
Thanks for reading <3
